Monday, July 06 2020
Happy Independence Day!!!! By the looks of Instagram and LinkedIn it looked like you all did a great job of making the most of your Independence Day holiday and celebrated our great country that we are all so fortunate to live in.
How grateful we should be to live in the really only free society left on this planet. Guys our problems are not as great as those in other nations, don't forget this. We have technologies and resources that most countries only dream of; don't forget this; don't forsake this; don't abdicate the God-given authority you've been granted to be here and make a difference for your wife, kids, family and others. Stay on task, take care of those in your sphere and keep chopping; Focus on what you can Control, not the things you cannot.
You can do it!! I know you can, you were made for this place, this time, to be with the people you are with and to do the things you are doing. Don't give up!
Focus on What You Can Control
This past Sunday while we sat in church all 3 kids between us and on the front row! I noticed some serious activity and squirming off to my right. It, of course was time for prayer and my youngest, God Bless her, was just wiggling like she'd eaten a box of donuts, which she had not. My first instinct was to lash out and grab her and hold her tight and shush her. But I am an adult, and I am in control of how I react and while my kids are my responsibility she is her own person and will act in ways I don't agree with, so this was not the time to 'catch' her. Trust me the old me would've loved to have scolded her then and there, proven my worth as a man to the people around us and put her in her place. But where would that have gotten us? A belittled child, who loves to fight back, in church on the front row with no other choice but to take our situation up to the next level. No thanks, I am in control of my emotions and responses, I am a man. My role is to model proper behavior, then correct as appropriate and hold the standard.
Focus on What You Can Control
That was not the only child who decided to be disruptive on Sunday. So I asked myself, 'how can I address this in a way that allows them to own this and teach a lesson?'
The answer: A new Sunday tradition called one-on-one with dad!! - ACTION ITEM
This was an amazing time. I sat down with my 6 year old, asked her about her week, her birthday on Thursday, her new toys and joys she had in life. I asked about church and if she learned anything. I asked her if she felt that it went well. She said to me, 'Daddy, I was really tired in church and I squirmed and my sister was talking to me and she made me squirm more and that's why I was moving so much, because she made me.' Now was the moment of TRUTH. This was absolute objective Truth that she would not fess up to. Of course I did not let her off the hook, we discussed that she and only she is responsible for her actions whether its a reaction or not, does not matter and that she needs to Focus on What She Can Control, herself, her words, her emotions, and her actions!
Wow! That teaching moment made my week. I am so grateful that I was in the front of the church without the ability to lash out and forced to exercise Control over What I can Control. I grew 100% and even better I got to do the same with my kids. Amazing!
Focus on What You Can Control
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11
“Know What You Can Control and What You Can’t. Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principal: Some things are within our control, and some things are not.” - Epictetus’s The Art of Living
This principle is timeless and proven and just and pure. It is something that our culture wants to ignore. But my oh my how much more can you get done when you stop trying to save the world and just save yourself...and then your family...and then your co-workers...and your community/neighbors.
Focus on What You Can Control
As a young man I watched too much news and I would stay awake all hours trying to figure out the problems of the people warring with each other. You see I was misguided in thinking I could solve them. As a pre-teen and teen I would grind my teeth over these stresses that weren't mine. I would spend so much time focused on that I didn't even make my bed, do my laundry, homework, etc. I was completely preoccupied with others' problems and solving them.
"And He said to them, "Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?" Then He rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was great calm." Matthew 8:26
What I needed was a reminder that I need to take care of what I can control now and when the time is right I'll be given the appropriate authority for responsibility for things that I can control. It's like this in all areas of our lives. Perhaps that's why I love solving problems for the families and businesses we work with each day here at Endeavor, where now I'm prepared and ready to address them, under control.
Focus on What You Can Control Actions of the week:
- Create your One-on-One with Dad weekly, 30 mins a week to do all the things an Endeavoring Man can Control with his kid. - Control what you read, listen too and consume. - Control what you eat, drink or imbibe with. - Choose to be in Control at all times, regardless of what flares up inside you and what injustice has been done to you. - Choose to own your day from the moment you roll out of bed. - Create a list of all the things you can control and how doing so makes your key relationships better.
Building forward:
Attributes of an Endeavoring Man: 1. Decide you are FOR something and not against it...I am FOR...this will set your sights on positive values and emotions. 2. Make sure you have quiet time for you with God and to meditate, you need this for peace of mind. 3. Pulse check with your family at least once a week. You cannot lead your troops if you dont know where their hearts and minds are! 4. The only disability is a POOR attitude! 5. If you don't use it, you'll lose it!!...MOVE and pick up something HEAVY Daily! 6. Play to your strengths, that's why God's given them to you! 7. Go big, make a splash and create RIPPLES that survive more generations than your own. 8. Run Your Race and only Your Race 9. Daily Practice equals Preparedness 10. You are the hero of your story not anyone else 11. Focus on what you can control and let the rest go
**Definition of Endeavor: to strive, toil, work towards something; Endeavoring the Act of striving, toiling, working towards something of value to you and those you love;
Endeavoring Men: are those that are striving and toiling to be the best they can be, to maximize opportunities, to grow in brotherhood with one another, to be held accountable to a higher standard of life, that leaves a legacy, first and foremost at home and then our community and understands this life is not about us...not about us…Glorifying the Creator.
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